digesting.

it scares me sometimes how fast i can get dissatisfied with life, and how i can feel fulfilled one moment and empty the next.

i wish everyone here was on holiday, or at least not as busy with whatever they have to do... but then i have to understand that they have their lives and routines and friends and i can't expect them to drop everything just because i'm no longer halfway round the world. and it's not like i gave them time in advance to plan for me being home. =P

i also wish more people were home.

i have found some things i wish hadn't changed, and some things i wish had.

i have come to appreciate some people in a different way, and i think a better way, than i did before. i have also seen more about some people that i don't necessarily like.

i'm afraid i'm not making as much of the precious time i have here as i should. i don't know how much of that is of my own doing, and how much is due to external factors beyond my control.

i have done some pretty cool stuff though - on friday ying and i went to batu caves and the forest research institute of malaysia where we jungle trekked for close to two hours, and we had no idea where we were for about three quarters of the time lol. it was a lot of fun, and i got to spend the day with ying so it was awesome. =) on saturday i went down to malacca, my parents' hometown. there i had good, good food, spent some time with my not-baby-anymore cousins, and met my maternal grandmother. i spoke to her in mandarin! =D my cousins have grown... they're not as cute as when they were toddlers, and they required more patience than they did last time, but they're still fun to be with.

i feel as if i've learnt a lot about my extended family over the weekend... the older you get the more you understand i guess.

oh, and i happened to come across some pictures of eugene this evening... and i was rather surprised to find myself missing it! guess i like ethnocentric nights and sneezing rain more than i thought. =P

so, i have three weeks left. only?

"so take the photographs and still-frames in your mind,
hang it on a shelf in good health and good time."

- good riddance, green day.